Roman: Red light violator’s favorite excuse is a real pisser


When people don’t stop for red lights or stop signs they give all sort of excuses from “I didn’t see it” to “I stopped real fast.”

Some will just lie about it and simply say, “I stopped.”

This past week an old favorite has come up again. A few women have tried using the old, “I have to pee” excuse. I haven’t heard that one in a long time, but apparently there’s a reemergence of people relying on their large and small intestines to try and get them out of a ticket.

I applaud them for trying because it just gives me a reason to write a blog post. In fact, two women gave me the “I have to pee” excuse while running the same stop sign on two separate days.

That excuse always reminds me of the movie Forrest Gump when he told the president, “I gotta pee,” after drinking 15 bottles of Dr. Pepper while at the White House.

Whenever I hear someone say, “I have to pee,” I simply reply back, “I gotta pee, too.”

The look on their face is priceless. They always pause for a moment as if they’re thinking, “Did that cop just tell me he had to pee?” That’s the best part because they all have the same look. It never gets old.

To show them I was reading their mind I’ve always wanted to say, “Yeah, I just said I gotta pee.”

The all time best is when a woman said, “I have to poop” after running a stop sign.

Even though I didn’t say it, I fought the urge to reply, “I gotta poop too,” but it would’ve made everything feel awkward if I had.

You never know when “number one” or “number two” is going to come up in a conversation. This is police work and people say the funniest things.

Editor’s Note: John Roman is a traffic officer for an Orange County police agency who writes a blog, Badge 415 ( His posts focus on the human side of police work and safety tips. Roman, a cop for more thsn 20 years, has handled more than 5,000 accidents as a collision investigator. shares some of his columns.